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A love letter to all the other mothers

I've had lots of ideas for posts over the last few weeks, but in my typical single mama speed (slow, if you're wondering), I haven't written any of them down. But I wanted to write something about Mother's Day, before the moment passed.

I realized my journey as a mother would be far from typical long before my son was diagnosed with autism. I've been doing it all on my own since my son was an infant, and in some ways, I've never known it any other way. Most of the time, I don't mind. It's our normal. I don't have luxury of having someone else put my son to bed, or make his lunch, or cook dinner. I don't have anyone to talk to about the worries that weigh heavily on my mind every day, about my son's struggles, his future.. Mostly, I'm just used to it. I don't think about it. I just get up every day and do what needs to be done. But there are days when the resentment bubbles up, when the sight of a man pushing a stroller triggers a pang of heartache, or when I see a bunch of kids playing together in someone's front yard... well, you get the picture. My experience isn't typical, and my son's isn't either.

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What I'm reading

Do you ever feel like you're spending too much time on your computer or iPad? I've downloaded at least ten books onto my Kindle in the last few months and although I've been enjoying dipping into them, I still love to read a good, old-fashioned paperback. So I thought I'd revisit some old favorites that are lying around the house..

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How to protect your emotional space

Post marathon-bombing, many people in my area are feeling tired and emotionally spent after the roller-coaster of last week. On the day of the bombing, I texted a friend and mentioned that I felt like I was on 'sadness overload'. In fact, we are all living in a world where we are constantly bombarded with bad news and most of us have never learned how to remain emotionally centered in times of crisis.

When difficult times affect us directly, that can be even more challenging.

So, how do you know when you need to protect your boundaries?

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These streets

I'm sure I'm not the only one, but last week blogging was the furthest thing from my mind. First, it was Spring Break, so that meant I had to clock up many more mom hours than usual. And then, the unimaginable happened... I live in the suburbs of Boston and like most people, felt very affected by the sad and scary events in our city from Monday afternoon when the bombing took place, until the suspect was finally apprehended on Friday night.

When my son went back to school this morning, I decided to take a drive into Boston, to walk the streets of the city I moved to 20 years ago. For me, this was grounding and affirming. Boston is truly a beautiful city, and a stroll down Newbury Street or Commonwealth Avenue when the magnolias are in full bloom is not to be missed. Perfect blue skies and a chill in the air made the walk energizing and grounding.

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Beautiful Boston

No words tonight. Just prayers for my adopted city.

So let each dweller on the Bay
Fold Boston in his heart,
Till these echoes be choked with snows,
Or over the town blue ocean flows - Ralph Waldo Emerson

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People to see, places to be

It's chilly and wet in Boston today. It feels like Spring has come and gone already! Looking forward to seeing a little sunshine over the weekend. What plans do you have for your weekend?

I didn't get much sleep last night. I know lots of parents know how rotten it can feel to drag yourself out of bed on a rainy morning when you feel like you were up all night. But I did make my bed! And my son's bed. And the bedroom in the guestroom where I tried to get a few minutes of shut-eye this morning (We play musical beds in my house... don't ask!).

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The Healing Power of Flowers

After my last post, several people asked me how to use flower essences. So I thought I'd post a short explanation here. Quite simply, flower essences are infusions of flowers in water. Unlike essential oils, there's no scent or perfume. The energy of the flowers is vibrational (much like a homeopathic remedy) and the liquid itself is conserved in alcohol or vinegar in a dark, dropper bottle. This is referred to as a stock bottle. The vibrational energy of the flower is then used therapeutically to help resolve emotional issues and achieve a greater sense of well-being.

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On Loneliness

“The only time we waste is the time we spend thinking we are alone.” - Mitch Albom

A friend posted the a link on Facebook today to an article about loneliness that asked the question "Is modern life making us lonely?" As a single parent and an ex-pat, I've often felt alone, separated from my family and finding myself navigating some difficult life circumstances other people my age weren't experiencing. And it's not just me. Modern life has made us more independent, with more opportunities to travel and move away from our families of origin. Western culture places a huge emphasis on independent achievement in work and business, and less emphasis on providing service and creating community.

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People to see, places to be

This Friday morning, I'm looking forward to lunch with a friend, a restful weekend, and hopefully some sunshine later!

These inspiring places and people on the web brought me some joy this week:

I never considered myself an outdoorsy person until I discovered that a) my son loves being outside and b) I love taking photographs. We've spent hours and hours in the woods and beautiful conservation areas that we are lucky enough to have right in our neighborhood. This article resonated for me. Won't you come on get happy too?

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The Gifts of Imperfection

I'm currently reading one of Brene Brown's books, The Gifts of Imperfection, and it's proving to be a thought-provoking read. If you don't have Brene's books yet, run, don't walk to the nearest bookstore or get yourself to Amazon immediately. You don't want to miss these beautifully written, engaging and accessible books tackling topics like shame, courage, and vulnerability and how women can live more fully and wholeheartedly.

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